The Confessions of Petunia Dursley
by books4evah
Summary: Petunia's not all bad. The story of Petunia, from the beginning. May be considered AU. Oneshot.


Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

AN: If you read my last story, I know that these stories are completely different. This is NOT the sequel to Sirius Black's Notebook. Just in case. Anyway, I had to do this. After the seventh book, I had to wonder whether Petunia was that bad.

**The Confessions of Petunia Dursley**

I miss Lily.

I really do.

Lily was my sister.

My best friend, too.

Why did I have to get jealous?

You see, before Lily got her letter, we were best friends. Albeit the fact that I was three years older than her. I protected her. I stood up for her. And Lily added that sweet and pure innocence to my life. We were never separated. I remember the time that we placed pinecones on our parents' chairs before dinner, and how loudly they shrieked. Lily was my favorite person in the whole world. And still is.

I hate Snivellus.

Now, you may wonder how I know that name, but I walked in on Lily stabbing a strange doll and muttering 'Snivellus' the summer before her last year at Hogwarts.

Anyway, Snivellus hurt our friendship. Lily was always hanging out with him, never me. I missed her. If she could have just stayed as my friend alone, I might not have built up that grudge against her.

When she got the letter from Hogwarts, she was ecstatic. She was jumping around screaming. I was out in the hallway, when Professor Flitwick, I think his name was, came to describe the school. My parents then got just as much excited. I got extremely jealous. People had already fawned more on Lily, as she was the prettier of the two of us. Lily would just roll her eyes, and we'd laugh it off later. But now, this was the worst feeling I had ever felt. First of all, everyone started fawning over Lily even more. Second of all, and more importantly, Lily was being taken away from me.

I started hating that school. That lead to hating the wizarding world, and eventually, I started hating lily herself. 'Freak' I called her countless times. How I hated how easily she left me. When she left us to cross the barrier, for her first year, I remember how my mother started crying over how 'her baby' was leaving her. That made me wonder if she'd say the same for me. Lily had then pulled me over to the side and said goodbye, she said sorry. I was touched inside, but kept my false cover. It was then that I started calling her the infamous 'Freak.'

That was the day my heart started to rip. Each time I called her a freak; my heart ripped just a bit more. Each summer, for the next seven years, I avoided her, and called her freak when I came in contact with her.

During her sixth year, I met Vernon Dursley. He was nice, and seemed to understand me. He said that he cared about me. Oh, that was a lie, through and through.

But I believed him, and we were engaged by the end of the next year. I thought I loved him.

Then, at the end of Lily's last year, she brought home her boyfriend, James Potter. May, I add, he's very hunkalicious. But I probably shouldn't talk about my late sister's husband like that.

He was a very polite young man. As I have heard, he is pure wizard. And if all pure wizards are like that, then PLEASE hook me up with one of them. He had heard about how mean I was, but he was respectful towards me anyway. That was the best night of my life. I was with my family, and future brother-in-law, and no husband. We all laughed together, and asked much about the wizarding world. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Lily shooting me weird looks, but smiling all the same. Looks like I wasn't the only one who missed the old days.

Later on, I blamed the alcohol on my slip of cover, but when James and Lily died, I became glad that I had that memory. Marrying Vernon was the worst decision of my life. He had to be told sometime about Lily, and when he was, he was even more disgusted than my cover was supposed to be. He was what kept me away from rebonding with Lily.

But, I couldn't leave him. My parents died after awhile, and we had Dudley. It would have been impossible to leave him without ending up on the streets.

Dumbledore mailed me, that fateful night when James and Lily died. I was her only family left, so I was the first to know. I was devastated, and I regretted so much. I mailed Dumbledore back, saying I would be glad to take care of Harry. Ever since, Dumbledore and I have kept a secret correspondence on the doings of Harry.

Vernon sure was angry that we had to take care of Harry. So, I kept my cover, for Vernon. If it weren't for me, Harry would be sleeping out in the streets, or would have starved to death.

But still. I couldn't look him in the eye. He looked like his father, no one could deny that, but that I could ignore. It was his eyes. I made the mistake of looking him in the eyes as a baby, and the guilt made me almost throw up.

I watched Harry and Dudley grow up together. Dudley disgusted me. He was so much like his father. But, I still was his mother. Harry was sweet and quiet.

Hogwarts for him was a long affair, but I finally convinced Vernon to let him go.

The years after that passed in a blur. I remember reading Dumbledore's letters and smiling. Don't think I didn't find his stash in his fourth year. I figured he needed some sustenance, compared to Dudley. The summer before fifth blew my mind. I was ever grateful towards Harry (in my mind, of course) after that. And Dudley. He started slimming down, and getting better grades. I was so proud when he got straight As, instead of his usual Cs. It was after those wizards, Emmeline Vance and Dedalus Diggle, I think their names were, took us away to be safe, that Dudley and I made out move. They asked us where we wanted to be taken. Vernon said Oxford, which was near one of his Grunnings offices, but I told them to take Dudley and me to York. Vernon was shocked, but then returned to normal, and demanded to know what we were doing. I told him, and showed him the divorce forms that I had filled out earlier. He yelled, and told the wizards to let him out wherever. They did so.

Dudley and I were placed in a quaint little house in Southern England. Dudley became a history teacher, and married soon. They had a daughter; her name is Lilac, as to carry on the tradition in my family, naming the females after flowers. Little Lilac was dirty blond, with eyes the same as Lily's. That was a shock, but I was happy, nonetheless. When Lilac showed her first signs of magical abilities, I was thrilled, as was Dudley. But, his wife, ever the oaf (just like Vernon), was horrified, after we told her about magic. She turned her back on us, and the baby.

Ever since, Dudley and I have lived together to raise Lilac, with proper values and everything. This year, in fact was her first year at Hogwarts.

But, here I am. Visiting Lily's grave. Dudley and Lilac are here too, but not with me at the moment. At first, I tried to hold back tears, but I'm whole-heartedly sobbing now. I miss Lily. My sister. My playmate. My best friend.

"Aunt Petunia?"

I spun around from my spot; I was kneeling on the ground next to Lily's grave, sobbing. The speaker had messy black hair and seemed to be in his lat thirties. His eyes were green.

"Harry?"

"What are you doing here?"

I stared at him. "What else could I be doing, other than visiting my sister's grave?"

"Well… I'm sorry, but, I thought you hated her?"

"Ahh. I don't hate her." Looking at Harry's shocked face, I continued, "She's my sister, and my best friend…"

I went on to explain to him the whole story.

Harry seemed genuinely sorry. But before he could say anything in response, Lilac came running up.

"Grammy! Grammy!" Lilac was pulling on a redheaded girl's hand, and Dudley was following behind, with an amused smirk on his face.

"Yes, Lilac?"

"Look who I found! This is Lily! From Hogwarts!"

"Lily?" asked Harry.

The redheaded girl exclaimed, "Daddy? What are you doing with Lilac's family?"

Harry, Dudley and I exchanged amused glances.

Dudley walked up to Lilac, and Harry did the same to Lily.

"Did I ever tell you I had a cousin?" they asked simultaneously.

"Dudley, here, is my cousin," Harry whispered into Lily's ear.

"My cousin is none other than Harry Potter," Dudley told Lilac.

The girls jumped up and screamed, "You're my cousin?!" and running to hug each other.

"Second cousin," someone behind me reminded them.

A redheaded woman appeared, two boys with messy black hair trailing her. A woman with bushy brown hair, and a man with bright red hair, followed, with two redheaded children.

Harry turned around. "There you are, Ginny. Finding the boys was hard, wasn't it?"

"Yes, quite," she replied.

"Oh, Petunia. This is my wife, Ginny. And our sons, James and Albus."

I looked at the boys. The one Harry said was James, looked exactly like James, even down to the eyes. Albus, on the other hand, looked exactly like Harry.

"How the heavens do you tell them apart?" I laughed.

The man with red hair looked apprehensive. "Hermione, isn't this the woman who mistreated Harry his whole life?"

The woman named Hermione glared at him. "Ron! Didn't you hear her tell her true story? Jeez, you can be so oblivious at times!"

"Wait…" I said. "Are these two Ron and Hermione? Your best friends, Harry?"

"Yes," Harry grinned. "Even now, that they're married, they still love to fight."

Ron and Hermione glared at him.

"Well," started Ginny. "I guess you're part of the family now. We must invite you over to the Burrow for Christmas. Mum would love it! Right Ron?"

"Yes!" he replied, but I could hear him mutter, "After we explain what happened."

I turned red. I knew that the Harry had always been a part of the Weasley's, even before he married Ginny. Hermione saw this, and elbowed Ron.

"Well, Petunia, I'm quite sorry, but we must go," Hermione started. "These kids must go to bed."

"Hey! I'm fourteen, you know!" shouted James.

I laughed. James pouted at this. The Weasleys and Potters left, leaving the Dursleys, but soon Dudley pointed out that he and Lilac needed to get home. I told him to go, I'd stay here a bit longer.

We bid our adieus, and parted ways.

I knelt right in front of my sister's grave. I recalled Harry's daughter. She looked precisely like Lily. And she shared the same name.

I remember all the good times we had together. I would have given my life to save hers, anytime.

I sat there, for who knows how long. Just staring at Lily name. Just sitting with my sister.

Before long, it was dusk. The pale clouds colored the peach-colored sky. Bitter winds blew leaves about me, and whipping my hair into my face. My cheeks stung.

But I sat there. Not daring to move. Fall was my favorite season. And Lily's too. That was something we shared. Along with the belief in an afterworld. I knew that I would be reunited with my sister someday. And I couldn't' wait.

It was beautiful. The night was slowly rolling along. Dusk, to evening, to midnight, to twilight, to daybreak. That long. I just sat. Sat with my sister.

"Lily," I whispered. "I'm truly sorry? Will you ever forgive me? I really do love you."

And for the rest of my life, I knew, I believed, I heard lily's vice among the rustling of the trees.

_I forgive you, Petunia. I will always love you._

AN: THIS IS NOT INCEST! This is not in the least a Petunia/Lily fic. It's sisterly love. Sorry if you haven't experienced it, but I definitely have. I have two little sisters. And an older brother.


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